Life..and Choices...oh the fun

I am in an interesting place right now. I am applying for teaching jobs and have heard back from one ISD and that was just an HR representative will be looking at you file. School starts in a month so if ISD's are going to hire they're going to have to do it soon, or so I would think. I have an amazing friend who offered to pay for me to take the SPED certification test which makes me so incredibly nervous because I don't want to waste her money and fail it. I thought about taking a couple of classes to get the knowledge but then that just adds to my already to high student loan bill. As always I'm thinking what if i don't get a teaching contract what is my backup plan?

Here are my ideas:

1. Apply to daycares both in Commerce and Greenville.

2. Go back to school and babysit.

3. Nanny but it is $75 plus tax for an ad in the newspaper

4. Work any kind of job and wonder why the heck I went to college.

The thing is I am committed to giving my year back to Chi Alpha so I really REALLY need a job that helps pay off my student loans. I really am starting to wonder if I heard God wrong but then I see all the things happening in Commerce and I remember that there is no other place I would rather be and there is nothing I would rather be doing than seeing people become reconciled to Christ.

What's next

What is the next step always seems to be in my mind when something happens whether it's good or bad. I really think that it's more what you do with the info. than actually getting information. I'm struggling in how I approach God and ask for things now. I know that HE is faithful but I really don't see it all the time. I have such need to hear from Him yet I feel like He is silent. I keep reminding myself of what I do know.

1. The creator of the entire universe loves me for me as I am right now.

2. The creator of the entire universe longs to have relationship with me more intimately than any other relationship.

3. I'm His child.

As long as these three truths stay true, I can deal with just about anything. I never knew how black and white I really am until the past 2 weeks. I've realized there is some room for grey areas.

This week has been an emotional roller coaster for me personally. But even in weeks like this I know that there is still something to learn. Here is what I have learned.

Spend time with Jesus EVERYDAY! It really does matter, because the day that you don't, you wish you had. It doesn't have to be in the morning. Just do it when it works best for you.

Pray when you don't know something first. Don't try to fix your problem in your human strength. It probably will be made harder.

Trusting God isn't always easy but it's what is best.

Follow through with what you know you're supposed to be doing even when it doesn't make sense.